{"id":4315,"date":"2022-01-24T16:06:13","date_gmt":"2022-01-24T16:06:13","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.bsuh.nhs.uk\/intranet\/?p=4315"},"modified":"2022-03-23T11:25:56","modified_gmt":"2022-03-23T11:25:56","slug":"if-you-only-had-one-hour-left-with-your-loved-one-what-would-you-say","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.bsuh.nhs.uk\/uhsussexcovidstory\/if-you-only-had-one-hour-left-with-your-loved-one-what-would-you-say\/","title":{"rendered":"If you\u00a0only had one hour left with your loved one, what would you say&#8230;"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Submitted by an anonymous staff member working on the Covid ward at St Richard&#8217;s Hospital<\/p>\n<p>For three weeks I have been working on a ward of Covid positive patients who\u00a0are deemed not suitable for escalation beyond steroids and oxygen support.<\/p>\n<p>In the main part I speak to lots of patient families, sharing updates on their condition daily.\u00a0This can be quite heart breaking, often I found myself preparing families for the inevitable.<\/p>\n<p>For some, those who are capable of talking to their loved ones, I set up video calls. Covid\u00a0has ripped families apart both in and out of hospital and this physical separation is never more brutal than at the end of life.<\/p>\n<p>Even though my execution of these calls hasn&#8217;t always\u00a0been smooth, witnessing families reunite and\u00a0the joy this can bring in such times of sadness, has been moving beyond words.<\/p>\n<p>Beyond this, I have been helping out on the ward in any way I can.\u00a0I&#8217;ve comforted and stroked a lot of\u00a0hands and found that spending time feeding those who no longer have the energy to lift\u00a0their arms to feed themselves has been sobering.<\/p>\n<p>I have had moments when I&#8217;ve cried my eyes out. Witnessing a couple, married for 70\u00a0years, having to say their goodbyes broke my heart&#8230;.. and reading a letter from a lifelong\u00a0partner to a dying man led me to sob uncontrollably. I tried to hide it from the patient but it\u00a0was just so sad beyond words I couldn&#8217;t keep it together.<\/p>\n<p>It really makes you think, if you\u00a0only had one hour left with the person you love most in the world, what would you say?<\/p>\n<p>At times I also felt like I became an honorary member of families. I would speak to them so\u00a0often that I would probably recognise them on the street now.<\/p>\n<p>One patient who was slowly passing away would drift in an out of consciousness. He had an\u00a0iPad which I would set up slideshows of all his old photos. He loved that and so did I and we did manage to laugh at times even during the darkness.<\/p>\n<p>Covid is savage. We could see when a patient started to deteriorate what their next few\u00a0days would be like. &#8216;She&#8217;s not going to make it&#8217; were predictions that seemed so stark at\u00a0first but always turned out correct. At times it felt as if I was watching people drown.<\/p>\n<p>No matter what we did to try and send a lifeline (steroids and oxygen) we just couldn&#8217;t grab their hands. And as they struggled for breath, I offered what felt like hollow words of\u00a0encouragement such as \u2018keep fighting&#8217;.<\/p>\n<p>And some patients would fight so very hard,\u00a0reenergised by seeing a video of a great grandchild or hearing their granddaughters voice on\u00a0the phone, but ultimately what is being asked of them is just too much. It&#8217;s like asking\u00a0someone to run a marathon for days on end and they just cannot do it. No one can do that.<\/p>\n<p>The staff on the wards are such gems &#8211; here are just a few:<\/p>\n<p>Leanne, the incredible big hearted nurse who cares for her patients in a bubbly friendly no-\u00a0nonsense way. If, and when you pass to the next life, she is the sort of nurse you want near\u00a0you at the end.<\/p>\n<p>Nicky, the calm and level headed ward sister. She can get a 90-year-old out of bed whilst\u00a0simultaneously give me instructions through the curtains how to get the saturation probe to\u00a0work. Her impeccable manners and patience seem limitless.<\/p>\n<p>Nurses Chloe, Liz, Rosemary, Antonia and many more, working so very very hard day in day\u00a0out.<\/p>\n<p>Jane and Sharon, the ward receptionists, who both contracted Covid in the line of duty and\u00a0gifted it to their families for Christmas. So generous of them \ud83d\ude09<\/p>\n<p>The cleaning gentlemen, who constantly and fastidiously mop and wipe the ward spotlessly\u00a0clean. What a job in these times.<\/p>\n<p>The physiotherapists and occupational therapist, Cindy, who really get the patients moving\u00a0forward in their recovery when their inclination is to stay in bed.<\/p>\n<p>Linda, Debs, Amber and all the other lovely Health Care Assistants, who smile and coax the patients through\u00a0this dreadful experience-washing and toileting them, always with warm words of\u00a0encouragement.<\/p>\n<p>Claire, the discharge coordinator, who has the unenviable task of finding homes for patients\u00a0to be safely discharged to. This is a role that seems to have a level of complexity I could not\u00a0begin to get my head around in three weeks. I&#8217;ve passed two degrees with less revision\u00a0time.<\/p>\n<p>The incredibly talented junior doctors and physician assistants who slog it out tirelessly day\u00a0in, day out. They are staggeringly capable.<\/p>\n<p>And Jackie and David, the dedicated, committed, thorough, kind and caring Consultant\u00a0Geriatricians. What a pair. Amazing.<\/p>\n<p>I cannot thank them all enough for giving me the opportunity to support them. I am\u00a0exhausted after three weeks. I don&#8217;t know how they can withstand this intensity long term.<\/p>\n<p>They all deserve our deepest respect. And a medal.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>For three weeks I have been working on Ford, which is a ward of covid positive patients who are deemed not suitable for escalation beyond steroids and oxygen support&#8230;.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":89,"featured_media":4830,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_expiration-date-status":"","_expiration-date":0,"_expiration-date-type":"","_expiration-date-categories":[],"_expiration-date-options":[]},"categories":[146,150,152,144],"tags":[170],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v19.7.1 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>If you\u00a0only had one hour left with your loved one, what would you say... - Our Covid Story<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.bsuh.nhs.uk\/uhsussexcovidstory\/if-you-only-had-one-hour-left-with-your-loved-one-what-would-you-say\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"If you\u00a0only had one hour left with your loved one, what would you say... - 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